


(you hate me) cause i got what you need

by brawlite, ToAStranger



Series: i'll be coming for your love (okay?) [2]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, First Time, Friends With Benefits, Jealousy, M/M, Pining, Roommates, also to note: unsafe sex, billy is great at deflection though, max is the only one with a brain, not the best communication skills, so that counts for something right?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-20
Updated: 2018-07-20
Packaged: 2019-06-13 14:39:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15366831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brawlite/pseuds/brawlite, https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToAStranger/pseuds/ToAStranger
Summary: “You smell like coconuts,” Billy murmurs. “Like the ocean, too.”He smells like fuckingsummerand a dream and Billy can't get enough. Not ever.Steve shudders, eyes fluttering, focusfallingfrom the TV to everywhere that Billy is pressed.  Tilts his head a little, twists to take his weight a little, forgets about everything else.Like he was justwaitingfor Billy towanthis attention.“That’s probably the sunscreen,” Steve says, bring a hand up to curve at Billy’s nape, thumb dragging back and forth behind his ear, fingers in the short crop of hair at the back of his head; his other squeezing at Billy’s wrist.  “And, you know, theocean.”





	(you hate me) cause i got what you need

**Author's Note:**

> title from _caress me down_ by sublime

Steve's already burning. They've been out here for two hours _tops_ and he's already fucking pink. Guy would burn to a crisp if Billy didn't keep an eye on him.

He's tried calling him over _twice_ from the lifeguard stand, but Steve keeps waving him off, too busy making _mooneyes_ up at the redhead knockout perched there.

Max plops down onto the towel next to him, spraying sand up. “You look like someone pissed right next to you in the water.”

Billy doesn't say anything, just grumbles, tears his eyes off of Steve and looks back at the ocean.

“Uhh, earth to Billy?” Max says.

“I'm _fine_ ,” Billy says. “Just hungry.”

Because everyone knows when Billy gets hungry, he gets angry. _Hangry_ , Max likes to call it. It's pretty much the most annoying thing she's ever said about him.

It's really a pity he had such a big lunch and isn’t hungry at all.

“Uh huh,” Max says, all slow, eyeing him. “And I'm a pretty little princess. What other lies are we telling each other today?”

“Shove it, Maxine,” Billy says.

His eyes drift again. Passing over Steve and the goddamn lifeguard again before he makes a show of surveying the whole beach. Like he's not _just_ looking at Harrington -- he’s looking at _everyone_ , alright? Checking out the real estate, the options.

Next to him, Max snorts. “Your crush is, like, _actually_ disgusting.”

Billy snaps his teeth together, turning toward her with a snarl. “I don't have a _crush_.”

Max rolls her eyes. “You've had the biggest boner for Steve Harrington since _high school_. I'm surprised you haven't _jumped_ him. _How_ long have you been living with him, again?”

Billy nearly _laughs_ at that, loud and stupid, because that's how he _feels_. It's absurd that he's _already_ sleeping with Steve. What fucking more does he even want?

But he doesn't laugh, he just grimaces. “We’re _friends_ , shitbird.”

Best friends, really.

Max bats her eyes. “Aw. That's _cute._ Does your _friend_ know you want his _dick_?”

Billy really wonders when she became so much like him.

He hopes she stops soon. Billy isn't really the world's best _role model._ Max is gonna end up _all kinds_ of fucked up if she keeps going down Billy's path.

“Don't make this a _thing_ ,” Billy tells her, because he's not about to tell her _yes_ and he's also not about to tell her _no_.

It's not that she's too young to understand the concept of _fuckbuddies_ \-- but Billy's not just gonna _say_ that kinda shit to her. It's easier for her to keep thinking he's some lovestruck idiot pining from afar.

Instead, he's just _really close up_.

Except that's not entirely true, either. He's not _lovestruck_. And he's not really _pining_. He's just -- greedy. Steve's one of the best things that's ever happened to Billy and he's greedy for more, resentful toward anything that could take that away.

That's all.

“I’m not making it a _thing_ ,” Max says, pulling her hair up into a mess of a bun, digging around in the cooler Steve toted out there for a bottle of water-- _those kids don’t fucking know how to hydrate_ \-- and cracking it open. “I’m just trying to make sure that you’re not being _stupid_. And it kinda looks like you’re being stupid. You, like, _know_ he likes dudes, right?”

Billy does laugh this time.

“ _Yeah,_ I know he likes dudes, Maxine.”

“Then why _haven’t_ you jumped on his dick?” she asks.

Billy rolls his eyes. “Pass me one of those waters, will you?”

“Pussy,” she says, and hands him a water.

“ _Okay_ ,” Billy says, because he's never been all too great at backing down after a challenge. “Okay, so what if I _did_ jump on his dick? We’re _friends_. It wouldn't change anything.”

“ _Exactly_ ,” Max says. “You’re already living together? And best friends? So, you start fucking, get married, live happily ever after. What’s the big deal?”

“It doesn't _work_ like that, Max. Then you're just fuckbuddies. Eventually he'll find someone to date and then we’ll stop.” Billy coughs, and then adds: “Or I would find someone to date.”

Max’s face scrunches up. “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard you say, and I’ve heard you say _a lot_ of stupid shit. You guys are practically _already dating_ , you go _everywhere_ together, he follows you like a _puppy_. Why wouldn’t you just--?”

Max cuts herself, blinking as Steve comes over, grin wide and plops down next to Billy, plucking his water from him and downing a big swallow. He shoves his wrist in Billy’s face, and there are numbers written in sharpie across his pulse.

“ _Told you_ I could fucking score her number,” he says.

Max lets out a breath, glancing between them. “ _Wow_.”

“How’s the water, Max?” Steve asks.

“Good,” Max pops up, eyes on Billy’s face and way his jaw has wound tight. “I’m just-- gonna go make sure Lucas doesn’t drown Dustin.”

And then she’s trotting off, leaving them in the shade of their canopy, Steve sprawled next to Billy on his towel. He tilts his head, sips at Billy’s water, and passes it back.

“What’s her deal?”

“It's hot. She's hungry,” Billy says.

He hadn't even been _serious_ about Steve getting the lifeguard’s number. He shouldn't have even said anything -- but then again, it was only a matter of time.

Billy shouldn't _care_ , is what it comes down to.

 _But_.

Well, _anyway_.

Steve squints at him. “Are _you_ hungry?”

“Sure,” Billy says. He looks at Steve's pink skin in the shade of the tent, knows that his shoulders would be hot if Billy touched them. “I'm always hungry.”

Steve’s cheeks go a little ruddy. He leans back on an elbow, grin crooked, and knocks his foot against Billy’s.

“Not _quite_ what I meant,” Steve says. “You got that look on your face. Like someone cut you off on the highway. What’s up?”

Jesus. People have _gotta_ stop looking at his face.

“I'm fine. I just _told_ you I was hungry.”

“ _Okay,_ jesus, _fine_.” Steve's nose scrunches up and he pulls away with a sigh, crawls over to his own towel and frowns in that way Billy _knows_ means he's taking shit _too personally_ again.

Which isn't necessarily unreasonable, because Steve _is_ the reason Billy's upset. But it's not Steve's fault.

So, Billy takes a second to breathe and then stretches, flopping backward on his own towel.

“So, what was her name?” he asks. A peace offering. Dredged up from somewhere behind his ribs.

“Kirsten,” Steve says, decisively, then hesitates. “I think.”

“Jesus. It took you a year and a goddamn _day_ , and you don't know what her _name_ is?”

Steve's lips press thin. “She kinda… _talked_ a lot.”

“Not your thing?” Billy asks.

“No. I mean, she just--" Steve shrugs. “Like, what is _with_ you California natives? Seems like everyone I meet wants to tell me their life story in five seconds or less, and-- and she's, like, _got issues_. Wouldn't stop talking about her exes? And I can _see_ why she's got exes, she's got that, like, _vibe_. And my dad always said to never stick your dick in crazy-- but he was usually talking about my _mom_ , so.”

“Pretty sure _I'm_ crazy,” Billy says, because he _can_. “And you don't seem to have any problem sticking your dick in _me_.”

“Yeah, but your crazy _fits_ my crazy.” Steve says, glancing at him.

Billy just shrugs, sand shifting underneath him. Under his shoulders, under his back.

“Well, now you're just being picky,” Billy says, because he shouldn't _care_ about who Steve puts his dick in. He shouldn't care at _all_.

Steve plucks at the edge of his towel, stays where he's at-- has this _thing_ about _sand._ “So, you think I _should_ call her? Cuz I'm pretty sure she's, like, psycho stalker crazy.”

“Donno, man,” Billy says. He wants to not give a shit, but. “If you don't like her, don't call her. It's your dick you're trying to get wet.”

Steve huffs. “You can't just… _tell me_ what I should do?”

That's something Steve asks of him sometimes. To _decide_ for him. Like he doesn't know how to pick for himself.

Which… isn't _wrong_. Steve grew up in a house where he was pretty heavily micromanaged. Didn't really have to pick things. More like they were shoved down his throat. Sometimes he still struggles with too many options.

And Billy is _happy_ to make a lotta decisions for Steve. But this is -- different. This is more than Steve ever really asks of Billy.

“Donno,” he says slowly. Billy _shouldn't._ But. “Maybe skip it, if you think she's some psycho stalker. We _live_ together. Don't want her all up in my business.”

And isn't _that_ too true?

Steve makes a face, waffles his hand back and forth, glances over Billy’s shoulder at (Maybe) Kirsten the Lifeguard and then nods his head. “Yeah, pretty bad vibe. Like, she’s _staring_. And it might be your ass that’s caught her attention, but… still.”

“I _do_ have a nice ass, don't I?” Billy says, with a grin.

Steve snorts and gives him a _look_. “Do you _really_ need me to tell you that your _ass_ is _nice_ , Billy?”

“I mean it wouldn't _hurt_ ,” Billy says, taking a sip of his water.

Turning over onto his stomach, Steve gives him a smile that means _trouble_. Billy wonders how he could’ve _missed this_ when they were in high school. That Steve was a goddamn _deviant._ That he wasn’t the little stick in the mud Billy always thought him to be.

The _things_ he can do with his _mouth_ are proof of that enough.

“Billy. _Baby_ ,” Steve turns those big doe eyes on him, reaching across the space between their towels in order to trail his fingertips up the inside of Billy’s calf, his knee, his thigh. “ _Your_ ass? Is _so_ fucking good. You get me so fucking _hot_ when you wear those tight jeans around the apartment. Just wanna get my hands on you.”

There's a special kinda thrill knowing that they're not alone here. That _maybe_ even the lifeguard is watching them.

“Okay, but _maybe_ don't give me a boner when my kid sister is like, forty feet away, alright?”

Steve pulls away laughing, face brighter than it was, and he flops back over onto his back, spreading out on his towel. “You _asked_.”

“You didn't have to like, full on seduce me, Harrington,” Billy laughs. “I'm a sure thing and you know it.” He rolls onto his back to mirror Steve and stares up at the canopy. “You're all pink. Did you know that?”

“Am I?” Steve asks, blinking down at himself, face scrunching as he tries to check his own shoulders. “ _Shit_.”

“Yeah,” Billy says. He doesn’t _say_ that he already tried to get Steve’s attention about it. It seems like a little _too much_. “You’re probably gonna want some aloe on ya, later.”

Steve sighs and looks over at him. “Will you get my back for me?”

“Obviously,” Billy says. Because he already can’t wait to get his hands all over Steve.

Steve beams at him. “Thanks, man. Dunno what I’d do without you hanging around, keeping me from killing myself.”

That’s… probably a little _too true_. Billy tries not to think too hard about it. Not that he, like, _actively_ has to keep Steve from doing things that are dangerous. Just that-- just that he can’t imagine Steve, kicking around a house by himself, _not_ doing something stupid. That sometimes he needs a little push in the right direction, and Billy’s surprisingly decent at that.

Steve’s got his therapist for the heavy shit.

“You think those little monsters are done for the day?” Steve asks, eyes back out over the water. “Like, can we _ditch_ them? I’m starving and I want, like, the fucking _biggest_ burrito I can get my hands on.”

“I want tacos,” Billy says in agreement. “Pretty sure we could ditch them and they wouldn’t even _notice_.”

“You’re a bad man,” Steve says, but he’s already sitting up, already shoving some of his stuff into a bag. “You’re a _bad_ influence. Woulda had a heart attack leaving them _anywhere_ not _two years ago_.”

“They’re like, adults, Harrington.” Just barely, but _whatever_. “You can leave ‘em wherever and they’ll figure it out. I mean, we _may_ never see our umbrellas again, but.”

But _tacos_. Even not hungry, Billy could _always_ eat tacos.

So. Tacos.

And _Steve_.

“I’m gonna text Dustin to let him know where we took off to,” Steve says, dusting himself off as he stands. “Otherwise he’ll think you fucking _kidnapped_ me again.”

“I’ve never _kidnapped_ you. Dustin’s just a fucking _idiot_.”

“ _Hey_ ,” Steve throws his towel at him, sand and all. “He’s _not_ an idiot. And you _kinda did_.”

“Okay,” Billy says, pulling a face. “Explain to me how I _kidnapped_ you?”

“Pretty sure it was _Max’s birthday_?” Steve says, pulling a shirt on over his head, damp and clinging a bit as he gathers up his things and shoves his sunglasses on. “She hadn’t even blown out the candles. You _straight up_ dragged me out of there. You stuffed marshmallows into my mouth to keep me from shouting.”

And Billy definitely remembers that. Remembers it _specifically_ because his _dad_ had shown up to that party. And, yeah, _okay_ , Billy and Steve hadn’t even been _fucking yet_ , but-- but it had scared the _shit_ out of him to think his dad might _see Steve_ and _know_ and--

And he doesn’t like thinking about what might happen if his dad ever _found out_. Even if Billy does his damn _best_ to _never see him_.

“Oh,” Billy says, teeth clenching a little. “Yeah, I _guess_ that happened.”

But it’s not fun. It’s not a _fun_ story to remember and to reminisce about. Sure, Billy had tried to make it fun for Steve, had tried to play it off as _whatever_. But it wasn’t.

“Whatever. Let’s just go, huh? I’m fucking starving,” Billy says, tugging a shirt over his shoulders.

Steve frowns and pads after him as he goes. Drifts close, the way he always does, and nudges his shoulder into Billy’s. Brushes his fingers against the back of his hand. Soothes him in that quiet, subtle way only he knows how.

Doesn’t comment. Just lets him be.

Steve makes it so damn _easy_ to fold into him. Stands there, strong, when Billy’s willing to let himself be weak.

“I want carnitas,” Steve says.

“Okay,” Billy says. “Carnitas it is.”

The Mexican place is a bit of a hole in the wall-- but the best food is usually from places like that. It’s one of those little shops with a butcher in the back, whole pigs and all, and they make the best tacos, the best burritos, the best _everything_. Even have fresh chorizo and homegrown herbs. Fresh baked breads.

They take their order to go, along with some stuff to add to their kitchen, and when they get back to the apartment, they curl up in the dark, in their living room with _The Sinner_ on because Steve is _obsessed_ with the damn show, even though it’s totally _fucked_ , but it was either that or more _River Monsters_ , and apparently Steve’s had enough of _that._ They sit side by side, Steve pressed close enough that Billy can feel the heat of his sunburn, and Steve keeps stealing sips from his horchata.

When they’re done, they sit there, Steve’s gaze on the TV. His mouth is twisted up, _invested_ , but he’s got one of Billy’s hands in his lap, idly tracing the lines of his palm with the tips of his fingers. Still soothing him, even now, knowing him too well to not know Billy’s still _stewing_.

Billy can't _help_ it. He's sun tired and full and for whatever reason his defenses are _shot to hell_ today, everything hitting a little close to home. So, he leans over and presses his face to Steve's neck, lips against deliciously warm skin.

“You smell like coconuts,” Billy murmurs. “Like the ocean, too.”

He smells like fucking _summer_ and a dream and Billy can't get enough. Not ever.

Steve shudders, eyes fluttering, focus _falling_ from the TV to everywhere that Billy is pressed. Tilts his head a little, twists to take his weight a little, forgets about everything else.

Like he was just _waiting_ for Billy to _want_ his attention.

“That’s probably the sunscreen,” Steve says, bring a hand up to curve at Billy’s nape, thumb dragging back and forth behind his ear, fingers in the short crop of hair at the back of his head; his other squeezing at Billy’s wrist. “And, you know, the _ocean_.”

Sure, Billy could find something snarky to say back, something to keep up their usual back-and-forth, but Billy can't help but think of Steve going all charming, all sweet, at the lifeguard. Can't help but be a little glad that Steve's back _here_ and not somewhere else, with her.

So Billy kisses him. Leaning in, slotting their lips together. _Slow_ , like he's really savoring it. Like he isn't rushed, isn't pressed for time.

Steve tastes sweet. Billy eats that up, licking into Steve's mouth as he gets his hands all tangled in Steve's windswept hair. He can taste the spice of clove and cinnamon. Can taste the citrus from his food.

Steve moans, soft and breathless, against his mouth. Presses closer, on the floor by their couch, and curls his hands into Billy’s shirt as he _sucks_ at his _tongue_.

“Wanna get you into bed,” Billy says, against Steve's mouth. “C’mon, I'll even put aloe on your back.”

“Yeah,” Steve breathes, stealing another kiss first. “Yeah, okay.”

Billy tugs Steve into his own room, because Billy isn't going to pass up the opportunity for his sheets to smell like Steve. Like sex.

“Lay down,” Billy says, patting the sheets. “I can get your back.”

Steve steps back, eyes not leaving Billy’s. He pulls his shirt up, over his head, and drops it to the floor. Strips out of his shorts. Stands there, bare, for _just_ _Billy_ to see, and then crawls onto his bed. Lays out, head pillowed on his arms, and _waits_.

Billy warms up the aloe on his hands just a bit, straddles Steve’s hips, and then starts smoothing his fingers lightly over Steve’s sun-pink skin.

“You should’ve spent more time in the shade,” Billy says. “You’re gonna be complaining about this tomorrow.”

Steve shivers as he touches over his shoulders, between them, down his spine. “I’m gonna be complaining about it for a _week_.”

“I know. You’re telling the guy who’s gonna have to hear _all about it_.”

But Billy’s not complaining. Because Steve could bitch all day long and Billy’d still be happy about it, just pleased as punch Harrington was talking at him.

Okay, so _maybe_ he’s got a crush. A killer one. Whatever.

Billy keeps his hands gentle as they glide over Steve’s ribs, resisting the urge to massage him. Steve’s eyes fall shut as he blows over the aloe, as it’s drying and soaking into his skin. Shivers and sucks in a little breath. Goes _easy_.

“Forgot to get my nose,” Steve mumbles, cheek squished against the back of his hand.

So, Billy spreads a little aloe over Steve's nose, too.

“You were the hottest thing on the beach,” Billy says. “Besides my ass.”

Steve glances over his shoulder at him, eyes narrowed on his face for a second, smile crooked and bemused. “Hot because I was _burning_ the entire time? Or hot you wanted _my_ ass, hot?”

“Both,” Billy says, unashamed.

And _god_ , he wants that ass. But he also doesn't want to push Steve into it. He's been all too happy to fuck Billy when Billy's offered, but hasn't _asked_ Billy to return the favor. Which is fine, because Billy _loves_ Steve dicking him down, but like, he kinda also _really_ wants to fuck Steve, too. At least once.

Steve’s brow goes up and he hums. Then, slowly, he stretches out beneath him, groans as his back pops. Props himself up onto his elbows and holds Billy’s gaze over his shoulder.

“ _Have it_ , then.”

“You want me to eat you out?” Billy asks, waggling his tongue.

“No,” Steve says slow, shaking his head. “I want you to _fuck_ me.”

And Billy can barely breathe, hands slowing on Steve's skin. “You sure?”

Steve makes a face. “It’s not _prom night_ , Billy. You aren’t _taking my virginity_. Yes, I’m _sure_. I wanna _feel you_.”

“Jesus, Harrington, you really know how to sweettalk a guy.”

But Billy's wiping his hands off on his thighs and reaching for the lube, anyway, heart beating _so_ fast. This is -- jesus, there's just something about Steve that makes him go weak in the knees. Even when Steve's fucking him, his heart skip beats.

Steve gives him a look. His face his flush, not just from the sun, and now that Billy’s _looking_ he can see the little hitch in his breath. The way his pupils are blown out. The way his fingers are curling and flexing, like they do, when he’s nervous.

“You wanna be like this?” Billy asks. “Or you wanna ride me? Don't think you should be on your back, with your burn.”

Steve hesitates, bites on the inside of his cheek, like he _wants_ something but has to keep himself from voicing it. “Like this,” he says.

“Tell me what you want, baby,” Billy says, because he _knows_ when Steve is holding something back.

Steve’s lips press thin and he flops back down. “I wanna _see you_ ,” Steve says, ears red. “But I don’t want you to _see me_.”

And that -- Billy doesn't know what to do with _that_. Because Steve is beautiful when they're fucking. He's the hottest goddamn thing Billy's ever seen.

“Well. You aren't gonna see much of me if you're on your stomach like this. I could close my eyes and promise not to peek -- or you could just blindfold me.”

Steve huffs out a little laugh. “Probably not smart. Like this. We’ll do it like this, this time.”

Billy bites his lip. He wants it, stupidly, to be perfect. He doesn't know how long they'll have this -- today was a stark reminder of that. “That doesn't seem ideal.” Not if Steve wants to look at him.

“Yeah, well, I’ve never--” Steve falters, sighs, _rolls his eyes_. “-- _ridden_ someone before, so I don’t-- I don’t know how _good_ that would be.”

Well, that's kinda a surprise.

“It's really putting your pleasure in your own hands,” Billy says. “You don't gotta be _good_ at it. It's gonna feel amazing regardless. You just do what feels good to _you._ I think I’ll _manage_. _”_

Steve hesitates again. Hunts over Billy’s face for a second, and then gives a little nod.

“Sit against the headboard?” he asks, always a little more tentative when it’s their first time doing something _together_ ; Billy lost track of the amount of times he checked in while fucking Billy that first time, making sure it was _good_. “So I can-- you know.”

“Want me to close my eyes?” Billy asks, as he settles down, already warming lube up on his fingers.

Steve shakes his head as he crawls close, knees settling on either side of Billy’s thighs, plucking at his shirt and the drawstring of his swim trunks. “Nah. Want you to get naked, though.”

“I _guess_ I could do that,” Billy says, ditching the shirt and shimmying out of the trunks with Steve's help. “Hey,” Billy says, catching Steve in a short kiss. “Don't worry about being _good_ at this. I can guarantee you're gonna make me feel so good.”

Steve nods, resting his hands on Billy’s shoulders, dipping down to catch his mouth. “Yeah. Slick me up really good, okay? Wanna be _wet_ for you.”

As if _that's_ gonna be a problem. Steve _knows_ that Billy's got this _thing_ about lube. Always using too much, loving the slide of it, the noises it makes. The request just makes Billy kiss Steve again, catching the breath right out of him.

“Gonna have you _dripping_ for me, baby,” Billy promises.

Then, Steve feels him sliding those fingers over him, running fingertips over the center of him. Teasing, pressing, but just a bit.

Steve sighs, lips parting, a pleased and soft little sound. He cants his hips slightly, rocks back in reply, eyes hot on Billy’s face as Billy circles his fingertips.

When Steve seems a bit more relaxed, Billy begins to press the tip of his middle finger in. Breaching him, feeling Steve’s body _give_ to him. Steve’s eyes flutter, shifting with it, chest rising and falling so steady it’s like he’s counting his breath. He’s _tight--_ just as tight as the last time, when Billy sank to his knees and swallowed him down; just as tight as the time before that, when Billy had Steve across his lap-- but his body _takes it_ like he’s _made for it_.

Takes it as Billy eases a little deeper, watching Steve’s face as Steve’s fingers flex over his shoulders. Takes it as Billy withdraws and presses in again, a little smoother, a little quicker, earning a breathy little moan. Takes it as he presses and works him loose, feeling the way he twitches and and ruts down to get _more_.

“Jesus, baby,” Billy says, trying to catch his own breath. He can't imagine how _Steve_ feels.

Around his finger, Steve is hot and tight, and he squeezes Billy so beautifully. So Billy makes him tighter by curling his finger and pressing in, right where it'll make Steve moan.

Steve doesn't disappoint. His breath catches and his hips lurch, and he stutters down with a keening sound like he's _surprised_. Moans like it's the best thing he's ever felt.

“More,” Steve says, pressing his forehead to Billy's. “Gimme more.”

Billy kisses him as he slowly slides his finger out. He keeps kissing Steve as he begins pushing two in, so slick, so wet, so easy.

“So good,” Billy says, against Steve’s lips. “You’re doing so good. You take it so well.”

Steve groans, fingers digging in at his shoulders, eyes squeezing shut as Billy fills him. Gasps as he bottoms out, as he stretches Steve _slow_ , so slow. Lets Steve squirm, spread on his fingers, working hot muscles as he adjusts.

Billy even works his fingers free, lubes them up again, and slides them home. Slick and slow, just filling Steve up until his knuckles press against skin. Adds more lube until he’s wet like a girl.

Greedy for all of the noises Steve’s making, Billy kisses him, eyes closed, just drinking Steve in as Steve squirms over his fingers. As Billy fucks him, working him open and loose.

Steve's cock is hard. Has _been_ hard, for a while, now. When Billy curls his fingers, it twitches between them, leaking from the head. Steve whines against his lips, pulls back panting, and grinds down, dirty and desperate, onto Billy's hand. Tosses his head back and gasps.

Steve is so _goddamn hot_ , Billy can barely _deal_ with it. He’s fucking pornographic, with the way he moves, sinful with the way he sounds.

Billy’s aching so badly, but it’s easy to ignore with how Steve pistons himself down on Billy’s fingers, with how beautifully he takes it.

“Can you take three?” Billy asks. “You ready for that?”

“ _Please_ ,” Steve's nails bite, briefly, in at his shoulders. “Please, Billy.”

Billy curses and pulls his fingers _nearly_ free -- but not quite. Then, he lubes up a third finger, until it's nice and slick, and then begins pressing it in. Stretching out Steve’s muscle, playing with the sensitive nerves there. Pushing in, just the way Billy knows feels _great_.

Steve's eyes go _wide_. His voice shakes out of him, a half cry of a thing, and he bucks, helpless to sensation.

“ _Billy--"_ he rasps, hips rolling. “ _God_.”

“Yeah?” Billy asks, slowly filling Steve with three fingers. Feeling the tightness of him, the heat, the _need_. “That feel good, baby?”

Every time Steve moans, Billy can _feel_ it around his fingers, Steve’s body clenching around him. And Billy doesn’t know _why_ Steve doesn’t want Billy to watch him getting fucked, because like this, face in ecstasy just over Billy’s fingers? He’s fucking _perfect_. He’s the most gorgeous thing Billy’s ever seen.

Nodding, face flush and hair falling into his face, Steve ruts with the press of Billy's fingers. Shakes as pleasure zips up through him. Sobs as it becomes _too much._

“I can't-- _Billy_ , c'mon, I can't--” he sucks in a breath, head lulling forward so he can mouth over Billy's jaw. “I want you. _I want you_. C'mon.”

“Hey,” Billy says, slowing the movement of his fingers. “Just a little longer, alright. Don’t wanna hurt you.”

Which is just -- _insane_.

It’s not like Billy’s a rough lover, but he’s never wanted to be _gentle_ with anyone before, not like he wants to be with Steve. Maybe it’s their history, or maybe Steve just broke something inside him -- but he just wants their first goddamn time like this to be a little special, alright?

And yeah, a little pain can be _good_ sometimes. Hell, Billy _loves_ taking it with minimal prep when he’s in the mood, but for someone who didn’t want Billy to _look_ at him, during? Yeah, no way is Billy chancing this.

So he keeps stretching Steve, keeps working him until his fingers slide nice and easy. Until Steve's whimpering and whining. Until he's fucking down onto Billy's fingers with a keen kind of desperation. Until he's shaking a head, hiccuping in breath after breath, clutching at Billy's shoulders.

“Stop, stop, _stop_ ,” Steve pleads, _gasps_ , panting open mouthed and desperate. “Don't wanna come, yet. Not until-- _not until_ \--”

Billy stops, stilling his fingers so that they just _fill_ Steve, the other hand on his hip to keep him from moving. Then, Billy kisses him, long and slow. Just giving him time, a moment to cool off. Because Billy doesn’t want him coming yet, either. Wants it to _last._

Eventually, he’s pulling his fingers free, dipping his hand down to stroke over himself a couple times. Adding more lube. Getting himself nice and ready.

“You ready?”

Steve dips down and kisses him. _“Yes.”_

With one hand, Billy holds himself steady. He settles the other on Steve’s hip and encourages him _down_.

Steve's slick and warm when he first starts sliding in. _Tight,_ too-- so tight Billy has to lock up to keep from bucking right up into him.

But Steve-- Steve's eyes are _wide_ and his voice is _gone_ and his body _yields._ Gives to the slow press of Billy's length as he eases down onto him. Muscles flutter and twitch around him, and Steve sucks down breath after breath like he's _drowning_.

“Hey,” Billy says, and he _knows_ he’s not supposed to really be _looking_ at Steve, but he can’t help it.

He gets both hands on Steve’s hips, steadying him.

“Kiss me,” Billy says, because that’s _always_ a good distraction, a way to make it _easier_.

Steve whines, frozen for a second, and then he's leaning down. Framing Billy's face with his hands, pressing breathy, hot kisses to his mouth, panting and sloppy.

Billy kisses back, taking the moment for what it is. Something charged, something electric, a small snapshot shared just between the two of them. He licks into Steve’s mouth, fingers drifting over the skin of his hips, to his back, just _touching_. Just savoring the way Steve feels around him, even mid-way down.

“So good,” Billy says, against Steve’s lips. “You’re so amazing.”

Steve sighs against his mouth, trembling, and he sinks down a bit more and _groans_. “So fucking _big_. So _full of you_ , Billy.”

Billy chuckles a little. Doesn't even bother to deny it. “Yeah, I'm a little _girthy_.”

He does his damndest to not buck up into Steve's heat, just savors it every time Steve sinks down a little and pauses to accustom himself to the stretch. Waits, as Steve lowers himself down. Waits, and is rewarded when Steve finally comes to a stop, Billy buried _deep_.

Steve slumps into him him. Presses his face to Billy's throat and hides there as he _breathes_ and _whines_.

“Hey, baby, you did so good,” Billy says, kissing him.

Because Billy's big and Steve is _tight_ , and clearly it's been a _while_ since Steve’s done this. It's always easier, Billy thinks, after it's fresh in your memory. Like your body remembers for you.

“God, you feel _so good_ ,” Billy tells him, voice rough.

Steve nods, breathless, arms over Billy's shoulders. “You, too. _God_ , Billy, you feel so-- _god.”_

Billy can't resist the urge to roll his hips _ever_ so slightly. Just rocking into Steve, not thrusting, not bucking. Just getting him used to it, giving him that spark of pleasure.

He reaches down between them, too, gets his fingers around Steve's cock to play with him, to stroke him as Billy’s cock stretches him. Steve moans, hips giving a little stuttering rut forward, cry catching in his throat. He goes impossibly _tighter_ , eyes shut, jaw flexing, and his hands slap against the top of the head board, making the wood groan when he grips it.

He presses his forehead to Billy's again. Lets their noses bump as he breathes heavy into the space between their mouths. Keeps his eyes shut as Billy gives him a little pull, grinding deeper, stretching him out.

 _“Fffuck_ ,” Steve whines, pelvis twitching forward, mouth falling open. “ _Fuck, Billy.”_

A hand drops between them. Steve presses his palm to the space beneath his own navel, groans, and _rocks_.

The implication of it is _obscene._ Fucking _filthy_.

It's all Billy can do to not buck up, to _not_ roll his hips hard into Steve to make him feel _more_ full.

“Baby,” Billy pants, feeling dizzy with it, with all of Steve's noises and his expressions, even though Billy's trying _not_ to look. Hell, he could come like this, just from the fucking _sounds_ Steve is making. “ _Baby_.”

Steve takes one hitching breath. Then two.

Then, he fists a hand into Billy's hair, kisses him _hard_ , and says: “ _move.”_

“ _Fuck_ ,” Billy curses, at the order, at the hand in his hair. At Steve's tongue in his mouth, kissing him hard enough to bruise. It's _all_ at once, it's everything.

And so, Billy _moves_.

He rolls his hips, rocking up into Steve, first in short little movements, then in longer thrusts. It's slick and easy, but Steve's so goddamn _tight_ that each thrust has pleasure sparking behind his eyes.

At first, Steve stays right there, gasping against his mouth, _taking it_. But then, as they move together, he starts rutting in reply. Riding Billy in earnest. Gripping the headboard like an anchor, head falling back, moaning as he flexes and strains to meet him, thrust for thrust.

He lets his mouth hang open. Breathes in short, sharp bursts, muscles working under his skin, abdomen tight. Billy can't help but run his hands up over it as Steve arches, as he sinks back down with a breathless moan.

“So hot,” Billy pants out, unable to quit looking, unable to quit _appreciating_ the long lines of Steve's body. “So fucking hot like this.”

Steve is _riding_ him, seeking out his own pleasure -- and there's nothing hotter.

Steve moans, lost and _gone_ to it all, eyes hazy and dark and dazed when they meet Billy's. “Wanna-- wanna _feel it._ Wanna feel you come inside me.”

“Yeah?” Billy asks, fucking up into Steve's heat. “Think I can make that -- happen.”

He's so close already it would be harder to try and stave it off.

And _sure_ , they probably should be using condoms. But they're _not_ , so.

“Tell me what it feels like,” Billy begs.

Steve lets out a long, low sound. Brings his focus back on Billy. Tries to form words with his voice as it cracks, as he gasps out his bliss.

“It's like-- it's like you're _filling_ me. Over and over and _over._ ” Steve says, hips snapping down hard. “It's like you're _connected_ to me _. In me_ in a way I've never-- like-- like I can feel you _all over_. Like you're something I didn't know I was _missing_ , god, _Billy_.”

And _jesus_ , that's a lot. Billy figured he'd get a _feels good, babe_ , or something equally inane. But Steve's always gotta up the ante. Always gotta give Billy something that knocks him for a loop.

“Yeah, baby? I can feel it too,” he says, surging forward to catch Steve in a kiss, hand still working him over between them. “I'm so close. So fucking close, Steve.”

Steve's breath comes shorter, faster, stalling as he rides down and strings tight. As he jerks and comes with a breathy gasp, like he just couldn't hold on any longer. Shatters apart with a sob.

Billy's right there behind him. Doesn't know if it's Steve's sob that gets him, or the way Steve's body _tightens_ around him, but suddenly Billy’s coming, pleasure hitting him hard and fast, coursing through his nerves.

He catches Steve's lips in a hungry kiss, arms going around him even as he's coming down from it, hips twitching, fucking into Steve with the last of it, so wet, so tight, so perfect.

“Billy,” Steve gasps against his mouth, riding it out with him, wrapping himself into Billy’s hold, tremors shivering up through the both of them; sighs his name again like relief. “ _Billy_.”

“Steve,” Billy breathes, breaking off the kiss just to pant, to bury his face at Steve's neck and kiss him there, at sweaty skin, at his pulse-point. “Jesus, baby.”

They still. Around them, the room smells like ocean, like aloe, like sex. Billy knows his bed is gonna smell like this tonight, like Steve, even after he leaves. Billy sometimes wishes he’d stay, but Steve is sleepless and restless at night, more often than not spending his time in the living room, away from any beds.

Right now, all Billy wants to do is curl up with him. Pass out on top of Steve’s sun-warm chest.

Steve breathes out, long and slow, and cards his fingers through Billy’s hair. Holds him close like he might shake apart without him near.

“Was it--” Steve falters, lips pursed when Billy looks, the glaze in his eyes gone for something sharp; a look he gets when he’s looking for a lie. “Was it good?”

And Billy _laughs_ , because Steve is so absurd. “Did it not _seem_ good, baby? Christ, Steve, it was fucking _phenomenal_. You are -- jesus, you are _so_ good.”

And yeah, okay, maybe Billy shouldn't _care_ so much, shouldn't put too much stock in the fact that sex with Steve is the best sex he's ever had, but it seems important to Steve, so.

“It was perfect,” Billy says, voice and face serious. “You're perfect.”

“Good,” Steve breathes, slumping against him, going easy as Billy’s hand smooths up his back. “That’s good.”

Billy muscles Steve down and onto the bed for real, slowly pulling out of him in the process. Uses his shirt to clean them both off haphazardly. Then, he gets his arms around Steve, hauling his warm body close. And if Steve has any qualms, about the closeness, the intimacy of it, he can take ‘em somewhere else. At least until Billy's passed out, or something. Because he's not losing this.

“Was it good for _you_?” Billy asks, because now he's gotta. Steve's got him all paranoid. “Did I hurt you?”

Steve tucks close, shaking his head. “No. No, you didn’t-- it was _great_. It was-- I don’t think I’ve ever come so hard in my _life_.”

“I think my _tongue_ takes that as an insult,” Billy says, thinking of the time he rimmed Steve for nearly an hour.

But he gets a hand in Steve's hair and threads through it, feeling a little better.

“Glad I ditched the girl,” Steve mumbles, a little later, like he dozed off between one moment and the next and he’s still half asleep. “This is much better. Like you better.”

It feels like his heart _stops_ at that. Moment, frozen in time.

“Yeah?” Billy asks, voice barely a whisper. “M’glad too.”

Lips, pressed to Steve's salty, sweaty hair. Barely a kiss, but _something,_ regardless.

**Author's Note:**

> **tracklist**
> 
> caress me down - sublime  
> feels like summer - childish gambino  
> ride wit me - nelly  
> virgin state of mind - k’s choice  
> am i wrong - nico & vinz


End file.
